There’s nothing wrong with being #2

April 30th, 2008

Basically, there are three different types of people in this world. There are those that do not, those that do, and those that do too much. If you are looking for a type to call your own, don’t be afraid to choose type two. Type one do little, and tolerate even less. When you ask a type one what they have done, or would they like to try something, their answer is most often nothing, or no.

Type one have trouble sleeping at night, because they are usually fussing over what other people are doing. Type one wash their hands a lot, worry about what might be hanging around too long in their colon, and have probably never drunk out of a puddle on a dare. Type one say things like your jacket smells funny, or that’s going to hurt or you’ll shoot your eye out, kid. Type one think they have seen everything, and that’s enough. They need to let their hair down, and relax a while.

Type two, on the other hand, will try anything once and, if they like it, try it twice. They have done a few things, and probably a few things they shouldn’t have. More often than not, type two had fun doing it. Type two will eat food off the floor if no one saw them drop it, worry if there will be a beer strike, and have probably dropped their pants in public at least once. Type two say things like I’ll never drink like that again, or that was the best or oh yeah, good times. Type two are always looking for something new, and usually find it. They live life in the fast lane, but know when to stop for a nap.

Type three, on the other hand, do more than you, and then do some more. When you look at type three, you see a little bit of yourself, if you were the type to stay up for three days eating nothing but gravel and gasoline, fight with the knots in your shoelaces, and argue with the dog. Type three dive in head first, with warning or without, and don’t care who knows it. They think hazard is where the Duke boys live, think helmets are for miners, and suffer from hypothermia because they urinate out of doors. Type three say things like dude, you gotta try this or this is awesome or hey, I can’t feel my legs. Type three think life is a race, and they are gunning for the lead. They are sometimes told to get a haircut, and get a real job.

None of this would be a problem, except that type one hates type three, type three hates type one, and type two prefers to stay out of everyone’s way. If you still don’t know what group to call home, try this simple test: If you have ever walked down the street and said just don’t look at those people, you are probably a type one personality. If you have ever heard someone say this about you, then you are likely a type three. If you have never seen anything like this happen, you are sitting in type two. The worst of it is, type three are such a danger to themselves and others that the people of type one try to put a stop to everything, and ruin it for everyone in group two. Type two can’t do anything with type one calling the shots. Whether it is smoking or drinking, singing or dancing, speeding or breeding, the best place to be is in type two. There really is no shame in being number two.